How would you handle a bully?

By Mom..

What should your reaction be when your precious child gets bullied?

Recently I brought Cassiel to this indoor playground at VivoCity. It was our second visit and we were glad to see her enjoying herself. Then along came an older boy who snatched her balloon and used it to hit her face. My heart was shattered to see her being bullied and she was just standing in shock as she thought the boy just wanted to play.

So fellow Mummies what would you have done?

I went over to comfort her and tell the boy to stay away from her. A few helpers with their employees’ kids also told him off. He just ran away laughing. Later, he pinched Cassiel on her feet when he saw her on a slide. Gosh, I was so mad now. I took Cassiel and asked the helper where his parents were, but they had just dumped him there with the helper for two hours. The helper also has no means to contact them. Then I thought to myself, “So what if they come? What can they do to ease the pain and hurt of my daughter?”

Just as I decided to leave, I saw two parents screaming their heads off at each other. Apparently the older boy did something to the young toddler and the toddler slapped the boy in response. The parent of the boy then slapped the toddler. Oh My God. I did wish that Cassiel can defend herself. But after seeing what happened, it seems like it will just make matters worse.

So how would you handle bullying cases happening to our kids?

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2 thoughts on “How would you handle a bully?

  1. Hi, well I’m not a mom by any means, 16, but I’ve worked with young children all throughout the summer as a camp counselor. I doubt that since you were in a public area that your daughter would encounter that same boy again, but for future situations you should first comfort your child. After that, make sure your daughter and the bully are separated from each other. I wouldn’t try to confront the other child or his or her parents unless the situation were to persist, and while confronting others, make sure to be calm and reasonable; you want to be a model problem solver for your daughter. Don’t try to persist if the parents are being unreasonable as the situation could escalate. Also, you and your daughter should discuss bullying and create plans for what should happen if she is being bullied; you can also emphasize that standing up for herself without being violent is a very good skill. Most importantly, make sure she knows how to leave a potentially dangerous situation. Good Luck 🙂

    • That’s very good and mature advice!! While the parents were fighting, I was watching the kids and their wide-eyed faces absorbing all that their parents were doing. Later, I commented to my wife that the whole episode probably started because of the parents. If the parents show the kids that violence is an acceptable way to resolve disagreements, then the kids will use violence to resolve their own differences. The kids probably saw their parents behaving like this before and followed suit to express their displeasure on the playground.

      I am sure we all want to be a positive role model for our kids, but we need a balance between to teaching our kids to be reasonable and teaching them to stand up for themselves. That is the challenge most parents face. Defending their kids against aggressive children and parents and yet maintaining a calm yet strong facade in the face of their provocation.

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